cursedglass asked:Thank you for following me! > o<
Your art is beautiful, by the way ’3‘
Your art is beautiful, by the way ’3‘
NOW THAT IT’S TIME, THE GIGAPAUSE HAS ENDED, I AM GOING TO FOLLOW EVERY HOMESTUCK BLOG ON THIS GOD FORSAKEN WEBSITE. WHETHER I FOLLOW YOU OR NOT, IF YOU’RE A HOMESTUCK BLOG, EVEN IF JUST IN THE SLIGHTEST, REBLOG THIS. EVERYONE. ANYONE.
and in other news
for all your upd8/paradox space needs
I got a four, what did you get?
I got a 6, lol.
I got a 6
I got… F? I failed the test?
I took it again just in case and it came out the same.
I got a 6! Surprised? I did not think so.
I got a 4
I got X
I’m a 3„, what the heck is that even
Both Hetero and Homo
So in other words I’m Bi, or Pan„ //I’m pan yes//
I can’t be both
A Midsummer Night’s Dream [x]
What with the Mercutio/Romeo kiss from the other day I feel like I should have a tag specifically for “men kissing in Shakespeare plays even though it’s not in the text, but after 400 years of unresolved sexual tension it’s time.”
..this is probably what I’m going to do when I see my girlfriend
I don’t usually comment on posts but FUN RANDOM DISNEY FACT : before Scar got his Scar (which was given to him by a wildebeest after an incident involving Mufasa) his name was Taka. He requested to be called Scar after this incident because he is a very over-dramatic lion as we already know! The source for this fact is from the Lion King novel series.
Damn you learn something everyday.
EXCUSE ME THERE IS A LION KING NOVEL SERIES EXCUSE ME EXCUSE MEEEE
Another fun fact: I just looked it up and in Swahili, taka means garbage.
So their parents named them literally “King” and “Garbage” omfg that’s so awful xD
that’s so MEAN NO WONDER GARBAGE WANTED TO KILL HIS FAMILY
it’s like loki and thor all over again
ALL HAIL KING TRASH THE LION
It means mud you fucktards
no child hush let them be happy about the coronation of king trash
When people tell me I need to stop “wasting” all my money on South Park.
a basic representation of what is going to happen if you tell us how to live our lives
south park is love
south is life (and death for some)
It’s transparent. Drag it.
is that dave
u readin this?
u a princess.
i dont care if youre a goddamn bodybuilder, now ur now princess protein
do you ever think about how little Michelangelo cared
All right, everyone, grab a chair and sit back because I’m going to share with you what I learned about Michelangelo and the Sistine Chapel in my Art History Class.
The man NEVER wanted to paint the damn thing. But the pope at the time “forced him to” According to my teacher. Michelangelo hated this man, I MEAN REALLY HATED HIM. So did a majority of people. The pope’s nickname translated literally means “Terrible pope”.
And the working conditions were awful. He had to work on his back with all that paint, which is filled with some toxic shit that gave Michelangelo a limp for the rest of his life.
(Also, our teacher made us get on our backs and try drawing with both hands JUST to prove how bad and uncomfortable it is.)
At the time, the ceiling was so high, you could barely see it. You need binoculars to get a good look at what’s up there, by the time people could see the paintings, there was a lot of weird symbolism that Michelangelo hid up there.
This one? The creation of the sun and moon? God is mooning you. And the pope and all others after him prayed under that without knowing.
This one? At the time, dissecting was sacrilegious and everyone found out how behind God was what looked like half a brain. blah blah, science, science, that pissed everyone off.
And also, ALLLLLLL the men and women in the Sistine Chapel are all on fucking steroids. My teacher described the women’s bodies as "Men bodies with boobs slapped on."
And then there is this:
Now this is the back wall. Michelangelo actually wanted to paint this one after he finished the ceiling. (and there was a different pope too, I believe.) However, originally, EVERYONE in that painting was naked. And they didn’t like it. Adam and Eve naked? That’s cool. But Jesus? Now you crossed the line. So the pope at the time hired someone else to censor it and give the important figures clothes. He worked on it for 6 or 9 months before he died.
And then the symbolism in this one is great. Somewhere in the right, there are homosexuals in heaven. (No matter what, the Vatican will say “Those straight men are happy” I’ll get to that in a second), Michelangelo painted himself near Jesus, and the terrible pope is in hell with a snake biting his balls.
And if you were to point ANY of this out to the Vatican, they will deny all of it and claim Michelangelo was a catholic hero. In fact, when they discovered the symbolism around the 60s or 70s, the guy who told the Vatican was kicked out of the Vatican for life.
TL;DR: Michelangelo hated the pope and made the best “fuck you” of all time.
YO. ALL OF THIS^. Michelangelo was hella grumpy all of the time. It was fantastic.
However, as beautiful as this commentary is, I’m gonna make a little correction. The Pope isn’t the one in hell getting his balls bitten; that guy is actually the Papal Minister of Ceremonies a the time, Biagio de Cesena.
See, when Michelangelo was painting this, as you said, lots of people were uncomfortable with all of the nudity (especially because the Last Judgement [back wall mural] was painted much later when nudity in religious art was even more controversial than before), but the dude who was the angriest was de Cesena.
He was so angry that he reportedly burst in on Michelangelo while he was working (which is already a big no-no because Michelangelo’s requirements for working were mostly “fuck the hell off and leave me alone or else I quit and I will stab you in the eye with my paintbrush/chisel”.). He then proceeds to tell Michelangelo that this fresco is disgusting and obscene and shame on him etc etc. He also referred to it as “i stui di nudi”, which means “A stew of nudes” which is one of the best descriptions of a thing ever, if you ask me.
So Michelangelo, probably on the cusp of homicide is like “Thank you for the notes. Now get the fuck out,” and de Cesena reluctantly does.
Later, he comes to see the finished product and finds that Michelangelo had painted his portrait down in Hell to represent the Minos, King of the Dead. He has the ears of an ass and the above described crotch biting snake:
Upon seeing this and being enraged, de Cesena went to the Pope to demand that it be changed and that Michelangelo be punished. However, the Pope was SO incredibly done dealing with Michelangelo’s snark, tantrums, and general hatred of the world and everyone in it, that he didn’t want to do shit.
The Pope’s response to him was literally to say “As Pope, I have a lot of influence on Earth and up in Heaven, but I have no jurisdiction in Hell. You’re shit out of luck.”
And it stayed.
Michelangelo, grade A artist, snark master, and professional dick.